I honestly need to just get something out. But I can’t yet say much of what I’d really like. So I apologize if this is vague or doesn’t make sense. But I’m hurting & nothing is making ANY sense. & I’m at, yet again, another crossroad.
I feel like the odds are working so much against me right now. & I will never understand why. I can’t even describe the pain I feel because it just doesn’t make sense.
I don’t feel trusted. I don’t feel good enough. No ideas of mine seem to be chosen as the good ideas. & I’m so tired. I have got so many damn responsibilities right now. And this should not be a problem of mine.
I’m at a loss. An ultimate loss. Either way I go about this current situation. Something possibly good is to come, but also something not so good is coming with it. & it sucks. I am not to sure how to figure this out. & when to strike. But every day. I try to let go a little more. & let God. I’m trying to hear what his plan is for me and my family. Not what my plan is for myself.